sun just coming over the mountain..
Have been busy lately, my dog is sick, not doing well, and looks
maybe to die...
so spent yesterday doing an emergency run to the border to get stuff
for her... had the usual problems at vetrinary supply, and figured
out the tico mindset may have contributed to my dog's worsening
condition, that they hadnt sold me the multi spectrum anti parasite
stuff that I asked for twice in a row, they sold me what they sell the
most of.. Which is whatever they feel like pushing..
so instead of dog being de parasited for everything as I assumed, she
was deparasited for a single class, and yesterday it took 15 minutes
insisting before I got what I needed to make sure the problem wasnt
parasites...
I go thru this all the time here, Ticos have a real problem, they
think they know everything, and that you dont know shit, and its a
country with no libraries, one TV station, that eats rice & beans 3X a
day from teat to body bag...
if you want to become enlightened, no need for an Ashram in India, or
a Monastery in Tibet... just go live with south of the border latins
for as many years as you want to be continually enlightened as to the
bad effects of letting egocentric thinking rule your mind...
some folks down here are humble & decent, but theres really bad
numbers on the opposites....
anyway, so also being contemplative about my own hand in the dog's
fate... not a nice place to go mentally... But one faces truth when
effect catches causer.... and so I'm here watching my dog suffer,
and wishing I had done better for her..
well, theres only one thing we never ever have to worry about, and
thats being perfect...
But life is a process of learning about one's imprefections too late
to do anything...
but better late than never...
I notice, & how I notice, that all the biting bugs are much worse
than normal this year.. Like theyre all coming up on their cycle at
the same time..
the chances of half a dozen different parasite type insects all having
their population high point at the same time are very slim... Unless
theres a causitive...
I suspect its climate change, and is also the stuff mentioned in Bible
about pests etc.. that we've screwed up the balance, and in this
universe that means you get smacked really hard by the reaction..
Generally in the animal world, of which I'm a member in good standing,
when they breed themselves silly, and pig all the food, pretty soon
their corpses are littering the landscape...
in our case the most piggish are thinking to kill off their thinner
competitors, and restart the cycle..
but if I understand things correctly, in humans, its the fattest who
live shortest..
so my guess is their plan will back fire on them as is generally the
case in a universe kept in balance by the Murphy Effect...
its cause and effect folks, no matter what the variables of the
moment happen to be...
anyway, I'm here keeping the dog company, & hoping all the stuff I hit
her with turns the tide...
but its down to prayer & tears.... and after being in Tico Town
yesterday, as I was huffing up the mountain, not sure if I'd find my
dog dead or alive, I realized that a shit eating dog is better than a
prideful hippocrit.. including my own version thereof...
the knowlege of good & evil, is reality 101, mostly learned first &
best by figuring out the hard way, what evil is, and where it takes
you...
which is where we are now, nosing into compost shredder..
anyway, had a good guitar practice at dawn, learning chord rounds and
exploring chord progressions.. Every day I learn something.. So I know
that if I stay relentless, I will get to decent eventually... and
thats my goal, to just keep learning.. Guitar is like life, infinite
potential limited by your own attitudes...
so, I write this between runs to the spring, chopping wood, washing
dishes, and getting my food trip together...
drinking tea with lemon, made over an open fire, trying to keep my
dog calmed as she suffers.. we've spent alot of years together,
having an ultimate good life for a boy and his dog.. Together nearly
every day, all kinds of hikes and adventures, plenty of hugs and
happy dogs, and we went thru some really hard stuff...
and I wasnt caught up in the rat race, and we didnt live in a filthy
city, and I'm happy to say my dogs have had better lives in better
places than most humans..
Rich people on this planet live lives I wouldnt subject my dog to...
vanity aint sanity...
a natural life is a good life, an unnatural life aint a life at all,
its hell on wheels & ego...
anyway, got the beans cleaned & on, was a bad year, rain in the
harvest season... so lots of moldy beans.. But one sits in the
morning sunshine, picking out the culls... Not as simple as buying
bagged products, but we'll still be growing beans here when city
people are hungry or nuked..
anyway, waiting for my dog to die, and the only thing I would change
if I had it to do over, is myself... be a better friend than I was...
It aint the human side of the dog human thing that has the moral high
ground...
--
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